Keep On FaLLinG

The man without a face moves slowly towards the end of the room, through out groping, stretching, reaching... he nears the wall at the other end. The struggle is almost done, what with all the shards of glass on the floor from all the thrashing that he did before sanity creeped in and took over his senses, to calm him and make him think rationally. He reaches the Wall.

Pushes forward to see if it's a door, an exit into the world with light. (Somebody tell him there are lights in the room, its just that he's faceless; ignorant to the light).

The first sign of a door, he pushes, he thrusts, he kicks, it doesn't budge. * where is the light, divine intervention, the beauty that i have been promised???* (somebody tell him its still the wall, is he so cut in the palms that he can't feel the coldness of the wall?!)

He keeps thrashing about, looking for the door... Nuthin.

Sometimes you just get way to claustrophobic, you need to break free, escape from the world that you live in. Escapism? I call it survival.

Sitting in my cell, staring at numerous boxes lined in straight rows and columns. Selecting preset formulas, using them like there's no tomorrow...never even once stopping to think that running a programme would be much simpler. But well we live in a world that is blinded by our own facelessness... optimising work does not end with the formulas in your excel sheet.

Drifting... this numbness, this feeling of heightened hyper activity, this over growing impatience to want to complete this blog. Thoughts moving at the speed of... now that i think of it, I don't really know or care how fast my thoughts are moving...

COming back to the faceless man.

Moving fast, in a city with blinding lights... trying to keep pace with whats around us. SOmetimes stopping to wonder, and thats when we see how far we have reached and have not really realised it. With all the problems around created in the time when we were thrashing around. And yet we stop to question what went wrong?

It had to be something that went wrong to have created all the mess. It cannot be you, you have it all planned. All th pain and all the sacrifices yuo make, it can't boil down to this that you chose the wrong alley to make the turn... or you accelerated too fast for the bend... or you baked your cookies even before heating the oven (here i go becoming judgemental again... somebody tell me to stop it)

Expecting the other to do it... we all got ourselves stretched out palms facing outward... like our facelessman trying to push open a wall... if the door gave way???!! We are all pushing, no one really taking up the responsibility. I always believe its never the goal that we need to concentrate on but the journey... I am too tired to write more...