the waits been long, 7 lengths give or take a few. The ride here had been eventful and now but just a memory a fleeting thought but woven with experiences that would make up for good night's sleep for the little ones. The stay has been lively memories that can be chatted over a fire with a good drink and close friends. The party's been long and wild and it seems like just yesterday i arrived as i go back to my bike for another stretch, another destination, another adventure. THIS IS TO ALL THOSE THAT MADE MY STAY HERE COUNT.
Now they say brothers are born out of blood bonds, they surely hadn't met a young group of boys that bore their brotherhood not only of blood but also booze. Now one was a buddy who nearly cost us our lives on a seemingly harmless stretch of road. Who once again nearly cost his ego with a doctor whom he never should have lied to, but anyway the stench proved the debauchery of a lost finger nail and ruined bike. And then there was the one that traveled as well into a dreamland that concocted reality where we would meet, only to know that we both needed each other's help just to fill up a form that we totally didn't believe in. Come on how can they ask for our favourite director when we didn't know the director who directed the films we liked!! yes, we were stepping into the same world together, over a kilo of tandoori chicken, parathas and a sleepless night with antacids. And then there was the other rider who came down from a different parallel hemisphere that can only be defined as "TOH...(small pause)...CHALEIN SARDAR." And the biggest of us all...the one with a heart that could encompass all our tears cannot be defined... we lovingly called him SID(from Ice Age). Now i wouldn't go to explain was it the way he walked or moved about, or was it the way he looked and spoke... ummmmm.....naaaaaahhhhhh lets not get into that.
Yes we built our home with late night business transactions over mayfair and park street, over films that SID invariably missed the 1st 5 minutes over chaat. Going to sleep over a silent Tele that played for the Sardar that invariably would wake SID to stand in attention. over matrix special effects of the same stench that doctors would shake their heads and say "musn't be lyin t' yer doctor and lawyer now." Over stomach upsets and sneezing bouts with the one and only Sudarshan churna. Even though Sudarshan would himself refuse us his elixir. Yes we were a band that believed that it could all be done. My time in Bombay couldn't have been without this lot of ruffians.
Just yesterday i also met a man of so much stature it scared me to hell but was so grounded as an individual that always one would wonder what makes the person. We met over a coffee from a vending machine and spoke about dreams, philosophy and a parallel world that might have existed. With his peppered mop of hair to his boyish smile and charm one would really think whats more confused, him or u figuring him. i think it was the latter. A person it might take years to figure out.
Yesterday wasn't very far away and today is just another day and yet we look to yesterday for answers for tomorrow. Which none of us are sure about. Have I really left all this yesterday knowing very well that it will all be there today and tomorrow. Do days really control us and how we are going to go about life. Time is but just another dimension i believe which is progressive and though we would wonder if we could move back time! Yet i believe the answer does not lie in the physicality of moving time but in the memories that make it real. My friends made yesterday for me real and not time.
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Monday, May 09, 2011
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
How Should I...
So many nights have i spent wondering and watching for a sign that would instill enough confidence in me to go ahead with what i have.
Sitting alone for long hours in the city's popular boulevard wondering in which direction i should go...
concious contemplations and perilous points to ponder.
I know the one who calls me brother is going through a tough time, I need him to find peace, solace and a life befitting someone who can call me brother. But how do i console him? The one that matters the most is far far away in perhaps the same dilema and really not able to comprehend on what course of action should be applied. I hear of it and i really want to do something, but no. There is hardly anything to be done, the rest is revolutionary. How does one reason with a broken heart and a paining conscience that screams the one name that should generally react to a whisper! Whisper a prayer, whisper it in ears to hear, whisper it so ages beyond should never have to wait for the whisper. Love, is it so blind to pain, that it drives the very inners to pour out with so much of vengeance that relative thinking and reasoning would seem like an enemy assault!
But that is not the way of the one that calls me brother. And that pains more for a brother. How should I tell him what I think should be done? How should i tell him of a love so pure that it later binds you to hate? How should I tell him that it will only turn to obsession and will later turn him mad? How should I tell him that all that i think is wrong? How should I...
I know the one that called me lover is somewhere thinking of a comeback. When over here in the midst of all my work I think of nothing else than what is there to see. Complains of hiding behind masks and loads of work just so that situations, thoughts, memories and nights spent together are blinded and locked up in some closet fall to ears of friends and of more friends. But I see it different. No pain. No blood. No tears. No feelings. A heart bled to full, does it bleed anymore? Does a mind lost and seperate and changed be wrong in saying no more? I don't want any of this anymore. Happiness. How should I tell the one that called me a lover that it's not me anymore? How should I tell the one that called me a lover that there is none to look forward too, when the minds at work and the heart's gone for a stroll in a psychedelic trance wilderness? How should I say that I love no more? How should I say that expectations of a life wasn't really expectations but a requiem of a dream? How should I...
I know the one that calls me dude/friend/brother is in pain and smiles when the rest of the world with ails of such would be counting days. A love that is fathomless seems hard to imagine and easy to dream. A love that there was is now gone because of times when someone had to choose. Does choice make a relation seem like a test? yes, I believe so. Broken and out, physically and in heart yet there is a glimmer of hope that the one that calls me DFB has to get me and the one that called me lover back again. I hate myself for bringing expectations for a dream. I love the one that calls me DFB but cannot take the choice that is offered because it moves me against all. How should I tell the one that calls me DFB that all love is lost and only a new one can enter? (beep you're out of the game) How should I say that all i care about is the malignant inners and that I hardly care for the cancer that has us all? How should I...
One has a love but has been moved away and longs a reunion, if not for forces of the underwind. One has broken away from the love of a good one and is trying to cement a relation. One has no love even when someone wants a reunion. One.
How should I go about this one?
Sitting alone for long hours in the city's popular boulevard wondering in which direction i should go...
concious contemplations and perilous points to ponder.
I know the one who calls me brother is going through a tough time, I need him to find peace, solace and a life befitting someone who can call me brother. But how do i console him? The one that matters the most is far far away in perhaps the same dilema and really not able to comprehend on what course of action should be applied. I hear of it and i really want to do something, but no. There is hardly anything to be done, the rest is revolutionary. How does one reason with a broken heart and a paining conscience that screams the one name that should generally react to a whisper! Whisper a prayer, whisper it in ears to hear, whisper it so ages beyond should never have to wait for the whisper. Love, is it so blind to pain, that it drives the very inners to pour out with so much of vengeance that relative thinking and reasoning would seem like an enemy assault!
But that is not the way of the one that calls me brother. And that pains more for a brother. How should I tell him what I think should be done? How should i tell him of a love so pure that it later binds you to hate? How should I tell him that it will only turn to obsession and will later turn him mad? How should I tell him that all that i think is wrong? How should I...
I know the one that called me lover is somewhere thinking of a comeback. When over here in the midst of all my work I think of nothing else than what is there to see. Complains of hiding behind masks and loads of work just so that situations, thoughts, memories and nights spent together are blinded and locked up in some closet fall to ears of friends and of more friends. But I see it different. No pain. No blood. No tears. No feelings. A heart bled to full, does it bleed anymore? Does a mind lost and seperate and changed be wrong in saying no more? I don't want any of this anymore. Happiness. How should I tell the one that called me a lover that it's not me anymore? How should I tell the one that called me a lover that there is none to look forward too, when the minds at work and the heart's gone for a stroll in a psychedelic trance wilderness? How should I say that I love no more? How should I say that expectations of a life wasn't really expectations but a requiem of a dream? How should I...
I know the one that calls me dude/friend/brother is in pain and smiles when the rest of the world with ails of such would be counting days. A love that is fathomless seems hard to imagine and easy to dream. A love that there was is now gone because of times when someone had to choose. Does choice make a relation seem like a test? yes, I believe so. Broken and out, physically and in heart yet there is a glimmer of hope that the one that calls me DFB has to get me and the one that called me lover back again. I hate myself for bringing expectations for a dream. I love the one that calls me DFB but cannot take the choice that is offered because it moves me against all. How should I tell the one that calls me DFB that all love is lost and only a new one can enter? (beep you're out of the game) How should I say that all i care about is the malignant inners and that I hardly care for the cancer that has us all? How should I...
One has a love but has been moved away and longs a reunion, if not for forces of the underwind. One has broken away from the love of a good one and is trying to cement a relation. One has no love even when someone wants a reunion. One.
How should I go about this one?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)